Freedom from Anxiety

Anxiety can come into our souls anytime. It often happens in the middle of the night, when everyone else is quiet but your mind is not. There are ways you can mask this problem and get some sleep, but when you wake it is still there, and when you try to sleep the next night...it returns, controlling your thoughts. The only real way to get freedom from this anxiety is the peace of God. At the moment we chose to believe in Jesus we have full access to this peace, that "transcends all understanding." When we are fearful, apprehensive, worried, or terrified,that peace of God can restore us to calm, assured confidence.

Even though life is unpredictable and too often filled with fearful or stressful situations, God says that we don't have to live in anxiety. This peace is can be given to us every time with we praise God and give Him thanks. It's best (I have learned over and over) to do this the moment we sense anxiety or any stress begin to control our thoughts. Then continue to praise and thank God until we receive that peace and the anxiety leaves. His word tells us to focus on what is "excellent" - I think of this like counting my blessings. So at 1AM when I am stressed, tearful, and overcome with anxiety I focus on my most recent reminder of God's love and His perfect Will, Rozlynn Faith. I focus on the fact that I have her and that makes things much better. I focus on my sweet Reese, my husband, and my family. Then I thank God for them and for the circumstances that I went through to get where I am today, in the midst of this overwhelming anxiety. Try it and you'll experience greater peace than you have ever known. Trust the Word of our Creator and you will be able to find contentment in every circumstance, even the tough ones where you can't comprehend how you will make it through.

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me - put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you...I have learned to be content whatever  the circumstances." Philippians 4:6-8, 11

When Words Don't Come

Have you ever prayed  for something with all your heart and it just felt like Heaven was silent? Man, isn't that hard to take? Or is it just me?...

I am thankful that I can trust my God, and I'm so thankful for His Word, that will not "come back empty." I know God hears my prayers and although the response is silent right now...He will respond, He will keep His promises, and when He does...it will be all for His glory, "that shall be revealed in me." This week has been a real downer! I have been spending some time in Isaiah and I am clinging to what it says in chapter 55:

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts....so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it." Isaiah 55:8-9, 11

I'm trusting in the fact that your thoughts Lord are greater than mine. What I think is hard and the way that I think things are happening is not Your way...thankfully! I know that you hear me Lord, your Words are going back to you and they are not going to return empty. I will continue to follow YOUR WILL and can't wait to see what YOU DESIRE from these circumstances, the purpose you have to be achieved, because I know that "this present suffering is not worth comparing to the glory that shall be revealed in me," Romans 8:18. Sometimes I feel so crushed that I don't know what to say, I just know things are not going at all like I feel they should. The way I so desire for them to be. "But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently. In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express." Romans 8:25-26

So even though I feel like the heavens are silent, "what, then, shall [I] say in response to this? If God is for [me], who can be against [me]?" Romans 8:31

I am thankful for this circumstance, this trial, as I see it because I know, "that in all things God works together for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28. I love him with every part of me and I am called to His purpose - I can't wait to figure out what that is...patiently I will serve Him, no matter what is not happening =)

People are Mean...

The hardest part for me about being a Christian is the whole, "love your enemies" thing. It's really hard for me when someone is mean not to me but to someone that I love...man it makes me MAD!!!!!!!!!!

I know anger is real emotion and God knows that we have it, but it is what we do with that anger that matters. This verse used to be painted on my wall at my house when I was in high school, "In your anger do not sin, do not let the sun go down while you are still angry." Ephesians 4:26 I tried hard to live by this, it wasn't until "adulthood" that it began to become so real and so incredibly challenging...because I felt anger in new ways: anger as a mother, a wife, a sister, a daughter, or a friend. I confess this to be one of my deepest struggles - having anger deep in my heart...just festering, I don't tell anyone about it - I just let it sit until I reach a point that it starts to seep out at times where I don't mean it to happen. It is hard to let go of hurt feelings...hard to forget those times you felt hated, cursed, mistreated, not taken care of, or watched someone you love be so unhappy because of other people (most of the time other Christians).

Sadly I am having to overcome these feelings right now. Here is all I know to do...

"But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If someone strikes you on one cheek, turn to him the other also. If someone takes your cloak, do not stop him from taking your tunic. Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. Do to others as you would have them do to you." Luke 6:27-31

God gave us His Word so that we would know the right way to live, when times are so hard that we cannot comprehend how to get out of the valley we face...we seek His Word and find the right way to overcome. That's why I love it so much, it is real it changes things and attitudes! God's Word builds you up feeds your inner soul with strength, direction, endurance, faith...you fill in the blank with whatever you are needing.

So today, right now in this valley I am in and in this hurt I feel for someone I love I am clinging to the direction of God's Word, I am going to "love my enemies, do good to those who hate me or my family, bless those who curse me, pray for those who mistreat me, my family, and someone that I love...do unto them as I wish they would treat me and those I care about the most." I will spend however long it takes praying for them for the anger and disappointment to leave my heart, and not worry about the rest. I want other's to see God and His Word alive in me. If I am "just loving those who love me, doing good to those who are good to me what credit is that to me? Even sinners do that, people who do not have the Spirit of the Living God in them do that." (Luke 6:32-34). Instead I must:
"love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful." Luke 6:35-36

Nothing will change your heart like pure true love, and when we spend time in Scripture and desire to live the right way,we are allowing God's love for us to change us - we will begin to see just how great His love is and we will desire to allow that love to change someone else. So bring it on..."enemies*" I love you and God's love through me will change you!

*I do not have any real enemies, I just have hurt feelings. I think that is worse sometimes!

Strength Needed Now

"...Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me.Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Corinthians 12:7-10

I have so many people on my prayer list right now that just simply need strength. Need strength for loved ones in the hospital, need strength to trust and wait, need strength to find happiness in every part of their lives (jobs included), strength to just make it through the day.

After Rozlynn went back to sleep this morning I found myself with some "me" time...I love these moments (I say moments because they are usually 47 minutes or less, the time it takes the sleep sheep to run out). I had text a friend to check on her and God reminded me of 2 Corithinas 12:9, I spent some time in the chapter and was reminded of a truth...sometimes a hard truth to handle for us mere humans.

Paul was asking God to take away the "thorn in his side" basically asking for this hard situation (ie...hurting or sick loved ones, trust, waiting, happiness, or just to make it through the day) to be removed. (It even says, "a messenger from Satan"...man isn't he, Satan, real...he delights when we feel helpless like God doesn't listen - when lose heart and faith when we don't get the answer we desire.) However, God said no...did you read that right above, God said no! Paul was asking with pure motives and in faith, but he didn't recieve the answer he was seeking...sounds familar to me, too familar actually (if you only knew...and some of you do). God responded to Paul with, "MY GRACE IS SUFFICIENT...MY POWER IS MADE PERFECT IN WEAKNESS." (12:9)

So today I thank God for the hard things the chance be drawn closer to God and the unexpected power that will come through it. If I just TRUST.

I am reminded that my prayers are not about getting what I want from God, but finding my way to God...finding my way to the deep relationship with Him that I so desire. My prayers are about accepting God's answers even when it's not what I prayed it to be, this is why it is, "not my will but YOUR WILL be done, Father."

If you find yourself needing strength, I pray you find it and you can remember the lesson we learned from Paul...sometimes we just need to trust that "[His] grace is sufficent, [His] power is made perfect in weakness."

Many blessing to you all!

yum...

Okay so I am addicted to these little pineapple cupcakes! They are super easy and only 72 calories per cupcake - icing included...but that probably doesn't do much good when you eat six in one day :/ YIKES! I love pineapple and love things that are not too sweet, so this is the PERFECT summer dessert for me. I am going to put coconut in next time, I just didn't have any on hand today.

Preheat oven to 350

Mix these three ingredients together(no hand mixer needed):

yellow cake mix, crushed pineapple (do not drain), and  rum extract

scoop into mini cupcake pan (I use a cookie scoop perfect size) and bake for around 13 minutes - depending on your oven
While cooling mix these three ingredients together (let the cold ones sit out for a bit so they are easier to fold together, again hand mixer is not needed on these...they are that easy!) for the icing:


1/2 of each: Free Cool Whip, crushed pineapple drained, and nuefatchel cream cheese



Finished product...just heavenly if you like pineapple you will love them!



OMG they are so good!



Trancendent Peace

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7

Last night Rozlynn went to bed and woke up about 2:30 - literally screaming, not an "I'm hungry" scream, one of those that hurt you - when you know something is not right. This was the second night she did this, the night before was awful, we got very little sleep and last night was taking the same path. Sunday night I had tried everything I could think of to help comfort her: gave her a bath, changed her diaper, gave her a paci, gave her a bottle, gave her gas medicine, and even gave her Tylenol (she's teething already!) and nothing was working. It was after I had tried everything and was at my wits end that I prayed...I know what was I thinking, I tried to fix things first...BIG MISTAKE! The second I prayed with Rozlynn she stopped crying and I was able to comfort her and give her what she needed to rest. Why didn't I just seek God first, and let him direct my path as to how to comfort His little miracle to me??

Last night I began the night with prayer and Rozlynn went to sleep so much easier. However, she woke up screaming and I had only been asleep for about 3 hours...I got frustrated, I was tired...it was looking like I would get less sleep than the six hours I had the night/morning before. I made a bottle and took her into the living room to rock and feed her...about 30 minutes later she was throwing up, and gagging like she does sometimes. =( it's really sad!! It was then decided to pray with her, to just seek God first before I attempted to give her what she needed. We (I say we because I believe God uses those moments with her and that she does learn from them) began to pray and talk about how Jesus is the only one who can give us what we need, we prayed for His peace to surround her and give her rest and comfort...we could feel it, the "transcendent peace" that "surpasses all understanding." It was beyond incredible! Rozlynn then squeezed my shoulder and made the sweetest little sounds, she was at peace. I held her for about another hour and a half enjoying the comfort that was surrounding her at that moment.

At that moment it hit me hard -really slapped me in the face - how there are so many people that I know and around the world that would do anything to have a baby, to be up at night dealing with screams, and the lack of sleep. I was one of those people, one lucky enough to get what I desired the most. I knew she came from God alone and here I was thinking about how tired I was and trying to just deal with myself. How dare I get frustrated with the blessing that God gave me...she is a miracle and I will never forget that! God gave her to me to raise and to teach and I must seek Him first in the decisions that concern her, even the ones at 2:30 AM.

I hope that this lesson will go with me in my everyday life as well. I know to seek God and I do with "big things" but what about the little things, the times when as a mom or wife I am flat out pissed, annoyed, so upset? It seems I must learn this lesson over and over again. I pray that one day it will becoming second nature, that I will not try to do things on my own and when I fail, seek Christ...because I will fail, it's not my will or my glory but His.

Just sharing what's on my heart today.

"Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you." Philippians 4:8-10

Something Heavenly #2

Almost exactly a year ago I posted this blog entry:
http://hightower-family.blogspot.com/2010/06/something-heavenly.html

After reading this post and listening to this song, Something Heavenly by Sanctus Real, I am once again in tears.

I knew God had "something heavenly" instore for us as we made the BIGGEST leap of faith we have ever taken when we left our home...April 21, 2011 at 12:45 PM we met "something heavenly", Rozlynn FAITH Hightower, and I am so thankful for our move and the HARDEST year of my life.

As I re-read my thoughts and feelings about Martin's Mill, I am once again overwhelmed by them. It is so hard to believe how many changes have taken place in the top ten things I love about that place, but yet how much they took care of me my family during a very rough 9 months. How many form schools, churches, and communities would provide for a family they way that Martin's Mill ISD, Martin's Mill Baptist Church, and Martin's Mill, Tx did for us. I had been out of work for one month and the staff of MMISD had a fundraiser for me and provided my family with and overwhelming amount of money, the Women's Ministry of Martin's Mill had a food drive and provided my family with many groceries to last us many months, and community members gave us a little something to help us through.

The most important thing was the prayer that continued to intercede for us. At Martin's Mill's graduation this year, I met a grandmother of former students and the mom of a former co-worker, she came up to meet and wanted to meet Rozlynn, her words still bring me to tear because I BELIEVE WITH EVER OUNCE OF ME THEY ARE TRUE, "I just had to meet this baby, we all prayed her here, this town and the people we know, we prayerd this angel to you." Yes you did, and I we are forever grateful. We cannot wait until we can repay to someone the compassion and "carrying of eachother's burdens" that was given to us...in the name of Christ. So, once again thank you Martin's Mill for being a Christ centered place, keep showing Christ's love - this is why you are so successful you are representing the right thing - a Powerful God!

Just wanted to share my heart. I will be back to the blogging world. Life has been crazy with a newborn and it took me about a month to recover from being so sick, I still have a few bad days but I am enjoying life and can't wait to share my new blessings with you all!

Thanks to everyone who has been praying for us and for Rozlynn. We love you all!