Memories

As we start 2011 and look forward to so many good things to come this year (the arrival of Rozlynn, Lauren and Clay's Wedding, all 3 cousins playing together, Kyle coming back to the states - just to name a few) I have spent a lot of time thinking about 2010 and the journey God has taken me through.

2010 left me with many memories and lessons that I will never forget.

1. Pregnancy #2 and the miscarriage of the baby. God taught us so much through this pregnancy (3 years of trying, many doctor visits, treatments, surgery, and diagnosis). The time of year this all occurred was so busy for us. I was busy with One Act Play, Cheer, TAKS, and Basketball season with both the boys and girls in the play-offs.
I remember the night it started happening officially (the doctor had told us it was going to, we had just been waiting for 2 1/2 weeks for it to actually happen) I was with the cheerleaders at a hotel in Austin. We were cheering for the girls in the State Semi-Final game then driving to SFA to cheer for the boys in the Regional Semi-Final and Final game, and back to Austin for the State Championship. I was in a hotel room with my friend, Frieda aka Mrs. A and her daughter, Carlee. Chris was at SFA with the boys, Katie was the girls, and Mom and Dad where at another hotel with Reese. Frieda was so supportive but I wasn't with my family. I remember very vividly going into the bathroom of that BestWestern in the middle of the night and sitting there for an hour experiencing some of the worst pain (emotional and physical) of my life. It remember getting so frustrated and mad that my family wasn't there for me (I know so selfish in the moment) but because of the circumstances I truly had to just depend on God to get me through. I had a rough night and spent many hours in that bathroom trying not to disturb Frieda. God was with me the entire time and kept reassuring me of my favorite verse (the one I quoted almost daily, the one that hung in my classroom, hung in my living room, and the one I shared with others all the time) "We know that in all things God works together for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28 I truly believe that this happened at the worst possible time so that I would lean only on my savior for comfort. Now, I am not saying my family didn't support me because they did and they loved me through the worst time in my life, but physically they just couldn't be with me. How amazing is our God, that He can always be with us physically. The next morning I woke up, went to the Drum to cheer for the girls and my sister, and then drove to SFA to cheer on the boys and my husband. I was able to hug my Mom that morning, hug Katie (my best friend and sister), and hug Missy (a friend who just understood me). I had 11 amazing girls with me to keep my smiling, laughing, and remind me of God's love as well as my friend, Frieda. Once we made it to Nac I got to hug Chris and see his family. Yes, it was so hard to sit in the stands, drive from Nac to Austin, put a smile on my face, and answer questions about my pregnancy when I felt like I was going to break at any moment (the community of Martin's Mill could not have loved my family more during this time and I am thankful for every question even if it hurt me to respond because each one was out of love), but I did it. God was with me, "for He hath said, 'I will never leave thee nor forsake thee," Hebrews 13:5.

The plaque that sits on our mantel and angel to remind us of our second pregnancy. My mom gave me that angel it touches me heart everytime I look at it.

2. 20 Children to love and a very special Mother's Day card. After the miscarriage I was still busy with One Act Play. I love OAP and I love the kids I get to work with. We always take the maxium number of cast and crew possible as well as alternates. These students are so inspiring they are all involved in multiple activities and successful at all of them including basketball, UIL, tennis, and track. The truly understand commitment and what it means to be a team. They have been with me through the years trying to get pregnant (they didn't know specifically but they had seen me through surgery and treatments). They were so excited when I became pregnant for the second time, some them were just as excited as me, they were just like my family. So, they went through the miscarriage with me and many of them shared in the pain I was experiencing, they were so sweet. I tried to be honest with them throughout because I wanted them to learn that God is amazing and what was happening was very sad and hard to take, but God was there and His glory would be seen. I told them before our Regional performance that God had not yet given me multiple children of my own but he had given me ALL OF THEM 20 OF HIS CHILDREN TO LOVE. Which I believed with every part of my soul, this is why I love being a teacher because I get to see God's children, build a relationship with them, and love them. I never really thought about what that meant to them, but God did. On our way home from Regional OAP we stopped at a convinence store, they had these gigantic Mother's Day cards and several of the students were buying them, I helped some of them pick some out, etc. What they didn't know was hard Mother's Day was for me, it had only been weeks since the miscarriage and it was just really hard. The weekend before Mother's Day we were having a pep-rally for all the UIL state qualifiers, and at the end of the pep-rally they announced a OAP meeting on the court. I thought this was weird because our season was done, but I went ahead and went down. I was then surrounded by the entire cast and crew who presented me with a giant Mother's Day card full of kind words along with many hugs and tears. It was so overwhelming to me that God knew how much I was hurting and he used those sweet kids who I loved to remind me of His love for me. It was such a special moment and I will never forget it!




The sweet card the OAP Cast and Crew of 2010 gave me for Mother's Day.

 3. Our move to Yantis. I was so against moving to Yantis when Chris first mentioned to me he was going to interview. They were a rival in our district, some of the students from Yantis had thrown and broken Reese's toys at a game in Martin's Mill - I just had a bad taste for them. I was at the Daniel's house swimming with Reese (which was a weekly activity for us in the summer) when Chris got back from the interview. I remember him walking up telling me that Mr. Oakley had already called and offered him the job, and a job for me as well. My immediate response was, no. I was really struggling with supporting my husband not letting my feelings hinder his ministry. I agreed to go and meet with Mr. Oakley a few days later to talk about a job for me and the school. Chris and I had spent the entire night before fighting (well not really fighting but in honest discussion of our feelings) about the possibility of this move. I LOVED and still LOVE Martin's Mill, my sister and her family is there, the staff and community are amazing, and they have given me nothing but love for seven years. I prayed for God to be in control not my feelings and that I would not get in the way of His will. After meeting with Mr. Oakley I was 100% okay with Chris taking the job. Mr. Oakley has the same desire to serve God and reach children, and he made it clear that many others would be in support of that same thing. We could see opportunity for us to be like Christ to the students of Yantis.

It has turned out to be true, the staff are so kind, and we have both got to share our love of Christ to students. Yes, it has been hard with me not being able to work and not feeling like I am not a real member of the team yet, but I know God wanted us here at Yantis. We clung to Romans 8:28 yet again as we moved from our family and our comfort zone.

3. Pregnancy #3 - Rozlynn Faith has taught us so much. The journey it took to conceive her and now the journey it is taking to get her here with us. After being placed on "bed rest" for the remainder of my pregnancy and 8 weeks past delivery we have experienced many more struggles. I can't do as much as I used to, the house is never clean, the laundry is never done, I can't be the coach's wife I want to be for Chris, and I can't do as much with Reese as I want to. Not to mention that I can't work so we are only getting Chris' pay check. We keep telling ourselves not to worry and to just trust God that he will provide for us. HE HAS.

My first two months off of work met us with an amazing blessing. I have said before how wonderful the staff and community of Martin's Mill truly are and here is proof that they are living out Galatians 6:2 "carry each other's burdens and so fulfill the law of Christ." Even though we no longer work with or live in the community with these people the staff put together a fundraiser at a basketball game were they auctioned off pies in our honor. They gave us over $1300. Wow, it still brings me to tears - it is so humbling to experience a gift like this. We had a hard time swallowing our pride and taking this kind of blessing, but we told God over and over we trusted Him, who are we to control the way he chooses to provide?

As if that was not enough a few weeks later the Women's Ministry of Martin's Mill Baptist put together a stocking of our pantry. We received 3 boxes of food and $200 in gift cards. This totaled $1500 and a pantry full of groceries God provided for us, we are so very thankful for the people of Martin's Mill and their willingness to listen to God and do His work. We have used and are still using this items while I am out of work.

Rozlynn will have many stories to hear about her "special" pregnancy. I hate wearing this pump, I hate being sick every day, I hate that I am still throwing up 2-4 times a week, I hate the headaches the Zophran causes, I want to sleep without being connected to tubes, but I know it is all worth it and I would go through every bit of this again for this sweet little girl.

Rozlynn Faith, I cannot wait to meet you, to hold you, and to see what God has planned for your life.

4. Reese on the journey. Man, it has been so hard for me in 2010 but Reese went through it all. Reese wanted a brother or sister so badly, he prayed for one every night, and it was really hard on him when pregnancy #2 did not make it full term. Before I found out I was pregnant the second time Reese told me one night that he had a brother and a sister. Reese had been praying for one before the second pregnancy. He told me that some nights he gets to see them, they come to his room a boy and girl but it is not time for them to be with him yet. He told me then he named them Matthew and Carlee. I just smiled and laughed, but the more I look back on this moment the more I am amazed. I believe there is nothing more innocent than a child and that they have a connection with Christ and I also believe that Christ was comforting Reese with these dreams of his brother and his sister. We do not know if the baby we lost was a boy, but a part of me like to think he was.

Before we told Reese about the 3rd pregnancy (we waited just because it was so hard on him the first time) we were driving home from school one day and Reese asked me when he was going to get a brother or sister? He said I know I have one in Heaven with Jesus, but I just want with me to kiss before I leave for school each morning. He was crying and asking why his brother had to be with Jesus. It was so hard for me not telling him there was another one...but I didn't let him know then. Reese was so excited when we told him he was going to be a big brother. He already is the best big cousin and big brother anyone could ask for. He talks and kisses Rozlynn and always prays for her. He bought her presents at Christmas (his own idea) and is already worried that she doesn't have enough toys and clothes. He is so unselfish, I wish I was more like him. I try to talk to him about when Rozlynn gets here and how life will be different. One night we were talking and I told him that the baby would sleep in Mom and Dad's room for a little while, but he would still have to sleep in his room. We've talked about Rozlynn crying a lot and keeping him up. However when we talked about Mommy having to hold Rozlynn a lot and might not get to hold Reese as much my heart was melted. He began to cry. I was thinking, okay he is finally going to talk about himself. I asked him if that upset him or would make him feel sad. He said, "not me Momma what about Nathan, won't you still hold him because it will hurt him if you don't. He doesn't live with us so we have to hold and hug him when we see him" WOW! He was worried about how Nathan would be feeling.

Reese doing one of his favorite things!

Reese Austin you are such an amazing boy. You have a heart for others and I cannot wait to see how God uses your love for people. You are an inspiration to me, and I love you so very much!


The Hightower family cannot wait to see what God teaches us in 2011, and how our new blessings will shape our family. Lauren is joining us in March - she has been such a blessing to Clay and our family I couldn't have asked for a better sister-in-law and aunt for Reese and Rozlynn. (They are getting already have an amazing Gigi and I know Aunt Lauren will be just as special) Rozlynn arriving in April - she already has it good between Gammy and Gigi (Gigi is what Reese calls Katie, he said Rozlynn could call her Aunt Katie - maybe he is a little selfish with his Gigi - she spoils him so much) her room and closet is staring to grow.

We are so blessed!